Feeling insecure about learning how to cook?

Question

I'm a 25 year old female. My mother never taught me or reinforced that I should learn how to cook, and actually cooked for me and my brother MAYBE twice a year. All we ate were boxed meals, cooked by my brother(my mother slept or just stayed in her room whenever she wasn't at work, out of laziness and as a way to avoid us). My boyfriend knows how to cook, but doesn't show me, I think from lack of patience. My relatives live in other states and I've hardly ever even met them, so there was no other female figure to show me.

I always had the interest to LEARN how to cook, but felt helpeless with nobody there to show me. If I told people I didn't know how to cook, they would assume that I had no interest...which isn't true.

I know how to cook SOME things(very few things), but I'm still not an expert and I feel bad for not knowing a lot at 25. Some recipes still confuse me a bit, but I'm willing to learn as much as I can.

For some reason, I still feel bad. Sometimes my boyfriend seems shocked and a little judgemental over my lack of cooking knowledge. My mom indirectly tries to put me down by saying "what's burning in here" (when everything is fine).

I feel stupid when I make what turn out to be simple cooking mistakes and what's worse is it makes me feel like a bad mother to my daughter.

Should I feel bad that I don't have more cooking knowledge at my age? Is my situation common? Why do I feel like everybody's mother teaches them how to cook lots of things? Are there any sites out there that can help me learn how to cook properly, as far as times and temperatures and things like that, not just recipes?

Answer 1

The Culinary Institute of America has a great series of free videos on their website that go all the way from the absolute basics in techniques to the more advanced stuff.Also most community colleges have general interest beginners cooking classes.They're geared more towards the home cook than someone wanting to get into the restaurant industry.Some community centers also offer basic cooking classes.There's also tons of private cooking schools.Just about any town of any size has at least one or two.As for books I suggest reference books more than recipe books.Like The Joy of Cooking or Mastering The Art of French Cooking.They do have recipes in them but they're so much more than that.They don't just have you blindly following a recipe.They give little hints on what you can do to fix a mistake or how to improvise.

Answer 2

I'm a 26 year old male and I'm not very familiar with cooking at all, yet my whole family think I have a keen interest! How weird is that. I mean, I cook all the time, but I never EVER branch out and cook difficult meals. I follow one recipe book all the time, and it's a basic learn-to-cook one from Jamie Oliver. I cook like 10 meals from there in a continuous cycle. Luckily, by the time I finish the cycle, enough time would have passed so that I can start again and I won't be sick of the dish. So I just keep on repeating it. Occasionally throwing in a new one every now and then. They're all easy recipes, but still difficult enough for them to be tasty and healthy. It's certainly my way of cooking. If I couldn't be bothered preparing the ingredients, I'll usually cook a steak and just steam fresh veges and have packet pasta or something. But what I do is miles better than my sister (who buys food ALL THE TIME, or just has toast and cereal and stuff). It's easy to get the hang of after a while. Just look for cookbooks that help people get into cooking, with introductory recipes. Before you know it you'll keep improving your skills and you'll eventually be cooking authentic national dishes.

Answer 3

I'm 26 but I grew up on fast food. My dad cooked once a week. Every sunday he would make spaghetti (not from scratch). I taught myself to cook. Don't feel bad about it. There are tons of people that can't cook like my mom and my husband. Anyway Youtube helped a lot. Also I bought a few cookbooks meant for kids. They usually have really simple recipes in them. Once you get a feel for cooking you can move on to harder ones. I will always be learning new things. Asking right here on yahoo answers is a great help. Sometimes I know the question I'm asking is stupid but people here are still really nice and answer my question. If you do make something and it doesn't come out the way you expected don't worry about it. It's a learning experience. Just figure out what went wrong and don't do it that way next time.

Answer 4

How you feel and what happened or didn't happen before shouldn't matter. You want to learn to cook NOW and you can start at ANY age.



Perhaps your mother is putting you down because SHE is insecure?



Start small and work your way up, check-out some books for beginner cooks at the library. All great cooks have had both small and massive faliures in the kitchen. You take those and learn from them.



Good luck!

Answer 5

Don't bet yourself up over this. Take it one step at a time. You can cook dishes that are friendly for beginners. Your boyfriend has the " girls always know how to cook" mentality, most guys I know think this way. You can look up some video tutorials at youtube for this or follow cooking blogs. If a recipe turns out to be a disaster, it is okay, part of the learning process. My dad is the one who taught me how to cook a lot of meaty dishes (carnivore that he is). Keep trying and don't mind your mom.

Answer 6

Everybody has to learn how to cook and everybody makes mistakes. Next time your boyfriend is cooking tell him that you want to learn and have him give you something to do to help. Cookbooks are great and are videos but there is nothing like someone showing you how. How about your boyfriend's mom or grandmother? Do you know someone at work? Many local community ed departments have inexpensive classes where there is theme- baking bread, making soups, etc

Answer 7

ok ignore your mother

she gave up her right to any say so LONG time ago

boyfriend should either step up and help you, or also keep it firmly shut



you are at least trying to improve the situation

you havent said how old your daughter is, i think meeting her nutritional needs is VERY important

but also your own

what have you been eating during pregnancy and till now??



its not really a matter of learning temperatures and times

everything takes different times

even you and i making the same recipe, my oven will cook at a different rate to yours



when someone has no cooking knowledge i would advise either, look at childrens cookery books, as they will start you off on simple recipes, look at student cookbooks, as they will also give simple, and cheap meals, or, look at a COUPLE of internet sites, dont overwhelm yourself



this one is Australian, but, only uses 4 ingredients per dish

http://www.4ingredients.com.au/



jamie olivers meals in 15 minutes

http://www.jamieoliver.com/recipes/category/books/jamie-s-15-minute-meals



and if you need REAL basics

delia

she is a bit old school, but shows the basics

http://www.deliaonline.com/



have fun in the kitchen

it shouldnt make you feel like this

Answer 8

I love to cook and was not taught by anyone . this seems to be a common issue these days .all you need is youtube and a recipe . look up any thing you are not sure about on youtube so you can see it first hand .and remember it is just food . it took me years to figure out how to make gravy my mom bitching right behind me every time . maybe she wants you to fail because of her lack of know how . .read and understand everything before you start and get everything together and ready before you start .

Answer 9

I learned to cook from early tv food network shows, and public broadcasting. today with the internet, there are plenty of video's. youtube, culinary institute of America, yahoo shine, and my favorite, www.bbqpitboys.com. video's can be replayed while you are cooking. simple rules, 1 use the best quality products you can afford. 2 fresh is best. 3 cook what you like to eat most. 4 watch what your cooking, pay attention to it. unless its a 5 hour roast lol, have a timer and use it. 5 have everything you need out and ready, spices condiments etc. so you don't forget to add them.

Answer 10

You can go to a cooking class or school in you area, it doesn't have to be an expensive school or high class. it's just to help you get started the basics, and so on. Cooking doesn't have to buy fancy ingredients, start simple dishes :). you can watch cooking shows on TV or read cookbooks.:D that will help as well.